Over the last few years, the phrase Don’t be a Karen has been used to depict people with a certain attitude. For the record, I know and love many Karens who are wonderful people. The phrase has nothing to do with the name, and everything to do with treatment of other human beings. For reference in this article a Karen is not gender specific. This applies to men and women.
Social media is filled with groups for cattle, livestock shows, and events. If you are not part of one of these groups you should join for the entertainment factor alone. Some of the more recent posts include, kids wearing cowboy hats in the ring, do you select your animals to buy based on the judges at major shows, and rants about how someone stood up to another parent for parenting differently than they do.
The comments alone should be played on the big screen so we can all enjoy the responses in comfy chairs with big bags of popcorn. I honestly believe some people post stupid stuff just to stir the pot. Others have legitimate questions and concerns.
The dawn of the internet and technology has shown us one thing, people are not as smart as we all thought they were in real life. That is okay though because there are many willing to learn. It’s those that are stuck in their own beliefs and ideas that think they know what’s best and should always share their opinions.
Personally, there are a lot of my opinions I don’t share because it doesn’t add value to the conversation. This is a tip many should start adhering to. Although, I will fully support you going off like a lunatic and making a fool of yourself.
When judging livestock shows, I see parents correcting their kids as they are leaving the ring all the time. It's not my place to justify the actions of others. It's also not my place to step into a situation that I have no part to play. I’d say 99.99% of the kids I talk to are wonderful human beings and I will be so proud to see them as productive adults when they grow up.
The parents have a right to raise their kids the way they want. Period. We have to respect other adults and their ideas, practices, and always ask questions.
There was a post recently on one of the livestock show pages where a person posted how they berated another parent for the way that parent talked to their child. This berater did not like how the parent was talking to their own child so the stranger decided to walk up, step into the middle of a situation they had no reason throwing themself into, and went after this parent. Then, the berater posted about it on social media and how much good they did and how a parent should never talk to a kid that way.
This is the definition of being a Karen. I will be honest, my family and I had some knock down drag outs at shows over a number of topics. The problem is we were all bull headed and thought we were right. Of course, I was the only one right about anything.
The thing is, strangers didn’t come up and get involved. Who do you think you are to walk up to another parent and chastise them for raising their kid differently than you? We are not talking about a kid being beaten. We are talking about a parent using language someone else found offensive.
We should always ask a few questions and understand why stepping is not our place. What are both sides of the story? If things are really rough, why didn't you try to de-escalate the situation? Why did you feel it was your place to tell others how to raise their kids? What happens when that kid or parent reads your post? That child will know exactly who it's about. How does it now make that kid feel knowing his personal life is now all over the internet by strangers? Was the situation so dire that it deserves all the hate in the comments in the post against the parent? Do we get to sit in judgment of how others raise their kids?
Bringing up topics like this in my opinion is dangerous and reckless. If the concern was so great, I figure show officials or the group they were with needed to be notified. That didn’t appear to be the case.
This is also an example of a humble brag by a Karen. The part of our society that humble brags on everything is over the top. "Please see what great deed I did today. We need to shame that parent." Or, "I feed 100 homeless today." How about, "Oh I am just so humbled to be nominated, please vote for me." That is the wrong use of humbled and a humble bragging combined.
We are better than this as a society and even as a livestock community. In no way am I justifying the actions of anyone. The problem is, I don't know what was really happening besides someone deciding to step into a situation that they had no right too and bragging about it on the internet.
This is as bad as the Karen's that tell you to put your mask on because you could kill them if you don’t. The situation is not much different. It’s all virtue signaling. You are not as good as me, but let me help you get there by telling you how to live your life.
As I have previously written, it is not my place to tell you how to live your life, that is your choice. It’s your choice to drink, do drugs, lie, cheat, and steal. It’s your choice to go to church, lead a respectable life, don’t lie, don’t cheat, or steal. It’s not your right to tell others how they should live their life. You live your life and let others live theirs. That is what happens in a free society. The Karens want you to live life how they see fit. You are doing it wrong; you have to do it this way - my way.
I had a parent tell me one time after a show that I could not beat a kid in showmanship because they didn’t have the right footwear on. I like kids to wear boots in the show ring. I politely told that parent that yes, I can, I am the judge, that is my style preference, and I have the final say today. When this parent told me again, I was wrong and no I can’t again. I politely ended the conversation with that Karen and went on with the day.
At the end of the day, we get more information and a better understanding by asking more questions. Or rationally talking to another person. Polite conversation is all it sometimes takes to change a person’s attitude and demeanor.
As we go through life on the spinning ball hurtling through the galaxy. We need to remember, it’s okay to not jump into everyone’s conversation that you were not invited to.
In the immortal words of William Shakespeare, "Who knows himself a braggart, let him fear this, for it will come to pass that every braggart shall be found an ass."
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