There is an old joke, it is hard to raise a parent - something I know I have joked about with my dad. The dynamics of households have changed over the years. It is becoming more and more accustomed to have parents move in with their children later in life. For me and my dad, it was how the chips fell in our life. I would not have it any other way.
My dad recently turned 88 and things are not what they used to be for him. He now lives in town, he has hearing aids, and he is a little slower than he used to be in life. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with any of that and I hope that I can reach that point in my life one day. I hope we all do.
The pandemic was rough on many people. Trips to the doctors’ offices are different than before, with required sitting in your vehicle until they are ready for you. If you have to go to the hospital for anything, it is one person at a time. Sometimes no visitors at all if they even think you have covid.
The worst part of all the pandemic, at least for us, is the fear it puts into the older folks. After a certain age, you seriously think about your mortality since it is approaching closer each day. Long gone are the fearless days of, ”Awe I’ll be fine!”. Older populations have been cut off from loved ones. They cannot go and hug and sit with their children or grandchildren. The isolation and fear is like no other.
This is not about the virus. This is about humanity. Some people have lost all respect for mankind. People have feelings, thoughts, fears, ambitions, hopes, and dreams. These people come in all shapes, sizes, and ages. If we give up on our faith in humanity and mankind, what is left? Why are we here on earth?
As humans get older our brains actually start shrinking. I learned this from the neurologist that saw over my sister when she was in the hospital after her stroke. The capacity to rationalize and make some connections change as we get older. It is almost like we are reverting back to a child as we age. The process is extremely difficult to watch.
What is important is that we be patient, calm, rational, and never argue when raising a parent. I am lucky to have a pretty good one at my house. It all comes back to understanding humanity. It comes back to understanding compassion. It comes back to being thoughtful of others.
What we are lacking in this world is compassion for fellow man. No matter what, we should all try to understand the person on social media, the grocery store, the gas station, or at work. We never see the entire picture. We never understand what that other person is going through in life.
As we go along and raise a parent, compassion for our fellow man is of the utmost importance. Remember to speak from the heart. Speak as if you were speaking to your parent you are raising, the child you have raised, or the best friend that has pulled you from the fire.
“Prayer is not asking. It is a longing of the soul. It is daily admission of one's weakness. It is better in prayer to have a heart without words than words without a heart.”
Mahatma Gandh
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